The painful mistakes that fuel growth

7 failures that teach more than success ever could

Read time: 7 minutes

A few years ago, I walked out of an important meeting feeling like I’d completely blown it. I’d over-prepared in the wrong way, totally misread the room, and left with a sinking feeling.

At the time, I thought it was a complete disaster.

Looking back now, the experience taught me a lot more than any of the “wins” I’d had up until then.

We live in a world that loves to showcase success—job offers, funding announcements, promotions. But I’ve learnt that the messy times are where real growth happens. The mistakes and setbacks are the parts of the journey that shape us most.

I’ve seen this across my career—as a doctor, consultant or founder—the lessons I value most don’t come from the big wins, but from the failures.

Here are some of the biggest mistakes I’ve made, and what I took away from them:

1. Racing ahead without the right direction

When I first started my company, I had a lot of energy but very little clarity. I spent numerous hours and a lot of money on things that ultimately didn’t move me forward.

I came to realise that pace only matters if you’re heading in the right direction. Sprinting down the wrong road just takes you further from where you need to be.

Action: Validate, test and gather feedback first. Then move quickly.

2. Choosing the wrong people

Early on I hired people without thinking very deeply about shared values and alignment. In the end it caused friction and slowed everything down.

I also underestimated the influence of the people around me—mentors, peers, even the media I consumed. I’ve learnt the hard way that the wrong voices cloud your judgement, whereas the right ones sharpen it.

Action: Be intentional about your circle. Find people who push you forward, not pull you off track.

3. Hiding instead of showing up

For a really long time, I kept my head down and avoided putting myself out there, as I thought sharing online was self-indulgent.

What I didn’t appreciate at the time is that building a personal brand isn’t about vanity; it’s about visibility. It opens doors, builds trust, and creates opportunities you can’t access otherwise.

Action: Share your journey including the wins, failures, and learnings. That visibility compounds over time. If you need help here, get in touch!

4. Saying yes when I should have said no

I used to believe that agreeing to everything meant I was ambitious, hungry and committed. In reality, I ended up overstretched and exhausted.

I’ve since realised that every yes is also a no—to your time, your energy, and your priorities. Once I learned that, I started being more intentional with my time and capacity.

Action: Protect your bandwidth and default to no, unless it’s an enthusiastic yes.

5. Running myself into the ground

I look back on so many seasons when I sacrificed sleep, health, and balance in the name of ambition. Eventually, I hit burnout—and learned the hard way that you can’t do meaningful work if you’re totally depleted.

Wellbeing isn’t a luxury, it’s the foundation. Without it everything else crumbles.

Action: Make rest and recovery part of the plan, not an afterthought.

6. Listening to too many voices

There‘ve been times when I consumed every book, podcast, and piece of advice I could get my hands on. I ended up with lots of conflicting opinions, spinning my wheels instead of moving.

I’ve learned to be more discerning. Not every piece of advice is right for you or your stage.

Action: Absorb widely, but filter ruthlessly. Keep what fits, discard the rest.

7. Doubting myself

This is the mistake I’ve repeated most. Holding back, playing small and assuming I wasn’t ready.

Time and again, I’ve discovered that I’m capable of more than I give myself credit for. I think the same is probably true for most of us—we’re barely scratching the surface of our potential.

Action: Back yourself and aim higher than feels comfortable. It’s almost always worth it.

The bottom line

Mistakes aren’t detours from the path—they are the path. Each one reshapes us, builds resilience, and keeps us moving forward.

Which of these do you relate to most right now? I’d love to hear—just hit reply and let me know.

Hope that helps!

Speak soon,

Dupé

PS: Whenever you're ready, feel free to enquire about working together: Get guidance on how to be more visible and grow your brand. Whether you need 1:1 coaching or ready-to-post content, hit reply and let’s chat!